I am sitting at my kitchen table looking out at the pouring rain. We have had far more days of rain over the past few weeks than we have had sun. If I had been planning to go camping in a tent today, or someone dear to me was planning a garden wedding, I would be very disappointed. Yet here I sit enthralled by the torrential down pour. It’s beautiful. There is something about the sound and how it seems to just slow everything down.
After the rain has stopped everything looks so green, lush and fresh. If we are fortunate enough we may even witness the wonder of a rainbow. Not possible if not for the rain. This phenomenon that for some is almost magical, for others is tragic in its nature.
I have friends who live in India and are now in the midst of the monsoon season where it rains for months. It can be torrential and result in major flooding and dangerous landslides. One of my friends sent me a photo of a landslide near his family home showing a house that had been halfway buried. Thankfully no one was hurt. A few weeks ago while they were fighting against horrific rain conditions we were battling forest fires and praying for rain.
My garden loves the rain. My monarch friends are immobilized when it rains. Children can splash around in the rain with total abandon. Adults not so much. Rain is rain. It isn’t just good or just bad. It is both and it is neither at the same time.
Over the course of our lifetime, we learn that this is just how life is. While one person will encounter an event as positive another may encounter the same event as negative. Classifications like good and bad are borne out of our individual and collective perspectives. We can choose to keep this in mind when we are assessing the changes we experience as we age. Is the decrease in our energy, and our need to slow down, absolutely a negative thing? Or could we embrace the opportunity for quiet and calm that it provides for us? In our young, busy years we would have been so delighted to experience this even if just for a short break.
If we can remain open to the idea that good and bad are, for the most part, matters of perspective and not absolute realities, we can extend further understanding to others with views different than our own. We could be more self-compassionate when we discover that our perspective on something, we were once so certain of, has changed. We no longer see it absolutely just one way.
There is no implication being made here that there aren’t things happening to us that we are hard-pressed to ever see in a positive light. We suffer great challenges and losses. Our dreams are shattered and our hearts are broken. This is a reality.
The intent here is to offer a glimpse into how reality is defined by our perspectives. Life is in a constant state of flux and so too are we. Our ability to recognize, and embrace, the value of changing perspectives keeps our lives interesting and opens us up to new experiences of learning about ourselves and others. There is no age when we are too old to experience a shift in our perspectives and see things through a fresh, perhaps healthier, lens.
This reminds me of the “Is your glass half full or half empty?” This question can be asked at all ages. It would be nice if, as we age, we look on the “half full” answer as our experiences and perspectives grow.
Yes, Cathy, it is just like that. I would suggest a more prevalent “half-full” experience as we age will require challenging our perspectives, especially those we have held on to for decades without question.
Spot on, Heather. We see life through the lens we choose to wear.
Its not just what we experience in life that makes us who we are, it’s how we choose to react to and embrace those experiences that forms our character.
Just like our prescription lenses need revision as we age, I think so too does our conditioned way of seeing life. As you point out, our perception is formed out of our experiences and how we react to these experiences. There is no age at which we can no longer question the accuracy of how we see things. I think this very questioning is one of the greatest gifts of aging. We learn that we are not “stuck in our ways”. We can choose to examine our lives and expand our character.
A gift of aging – love that!